Prison or Prism......?

So, I chose this name for my blog because really, it's kinda funny that the two words sound so similar.  Ironic.  A short two weeks ago, the thought of limiting my calorie intake sounded like prison to me.  Like a long, miserable sentence of deprivation.  To me, the license to eat what I wanted when I wanted it was more compelling than the nagging sense that I was not doing myself any favors by continuing in that direction.

What changed my mind?   It's like a paradigm shift.  I spend months.....years!.....deluding myself, kidding myself, minimizing, justifying, rationalizing.  And I'm the one that carries the load, physically and emotionally.
And then, one day, I can't stand the pressure of the lie anymore.  I break down and admit how miserable I am, not only because none of my clothes fit anymore, but on a deeper level, because I am believing a lie.  It never really feels right to believe a lie.

This time the breaking point came when my sister sent me a beautiful blouse and jacket set.  It was soft knit, in a drapey cut that should be very flattering and easy to wear.  But when I put on the jacket, all I could see was those hips!  Oh my goodness, how did they get that wide again?!  I could have returned the garments, exchanged them for something else......but you know, I didn't want to do that.  Even though it's a reasonable option.  I hung the pieces in my closet and let them be a nonverbal prayer request, gently reminding me that maybe something in my heart needed to change.  I didn't push it.....I just kept noticing that I was uneasy with my habits.

Then a couple of weeks ago as I was chatting with two friends who were also lamenting their own weight gain, a mutual friend was mentioned.  She was looking great, and had been part of a newly formed PRISM group.   My way of escape was before me.  Escape from.....PRISON!

As I write this evening, I have completed the first week of Phase 1.  And you know, it was easy.   Easier than living with the nagging sense that you're doing wrong.  I feel really good.  I enjoyed the meeting with my fellow Prism inmates:-)   For the first time in months I feel a lightness of spirit, and I thank God for giving me a hand up.....again.  Looking forward to sharing some of my favorite recipes with you all-----even if you don't need to lose weight, some of these discoveries of mine are just plain good-----and good for you!
Until next time!


Sue